Letting it sink in.

The moment the Radiologist told me I had cancer I noticed things I normally wouldn’t have. Simply because of the busy schedule we live. The race against the clock. The time you spend just trying to get to the next thing or next place. Chasing kids. Doing laundry. But after that call things were more crisp. The grass seemed brighter. The sunshine was warmer and the breeze could be felt on the hair of my arms. I called my husband and he immediately went into ‘kick ass’ mode. He asked what we were going to do and when did we start. It has been so uplifting through this journey because it’s has always been ‘we’. It’s never been ‘I’ or ‘me’. I’m grateful for that and grateful for him. I called my mom a couple hours later and gave her the news. I could hear her voice crack and the fright in her voice. I just reassured her that we would make it through this and it was going to be ok.

The next day my husband and I met with a General Surgeon whom I would grow to admire. One thing about getting a cancer diagnosis is you’re going to be seeing lots of doctors. You’ll have lots of needle pricks, lots of tests, and well just ALOT of appointments. With all those appointments comes alot of time away from work. I’ve been blessed to have an employer that has been extremely flexible with me through all of this. God sure does have his ways of working things out.

Between the day I went to see my GYNO, was biopsied, diagnosed and then met with the GS only four days had passed and on day five I had to make a surprise 60th birthday party happen for my mom! Yes, my mom was turning 60 and I had been planning a surprise birthday for her for a few weeks now. So the day came and all was ready for her to arrive!! At this point only a handful of people knew about my diagnosis including my mom. She obviously didn’t know about the party so I was going to make sure this party took her mind off of it and she enjoyed herself. I put a smile on my face, put my big girl panties on and did what had to be done. The party was a huge success, she was so surprised and had no idea! So many thanks goes to all of those that helped put it together and kept it a secret.

I don’t remember the actual moment I began telling more people. I don’t remember too many reactions but I do remember the support. I remember all of the hugs and all the amazing people we had standing right beside us and still do. The cards and care packages began to pour in. The calls and texts from friends and family asking what they could do. It truly was and still is amazing.

On October 10, our cousin hosted a Susan G. Koman 5K in our neighborhood in my honor. The turnout and support was spectacular. Walking down to their house that day I had no idea that when I rounded their street corner I’d see all of the pink and all of the people! It was breathtaking. Guys were in tutu’s, some had temporary tattoos, there were homemade shirts, mimosa’s, donuts, cookies, faces I knew and faces I didn’t. It was the beginning of a journey that I knew I was not alone in. A journey that would bring on a new identity of myself as a wife, mother, daughter, cousin, sister, aunt, friend, and breast cancer survivor. That’s right… a survivor!